Saturday, December 13, 2008

House of Pee

This week, I was going to write about deep and profound things.  Like how the political corruption in Illinois only makes me more homesick for Chicago.  Or how the 70-degrees-on-Thursday-and-40-degrees-on-Friday winter here in North Carolina is just plain confusing.  Or how I love my big bowl of cereal in the morning just a little too much.  But then, something bigger came up and trumped my plan to wax poetic.

That something is cat pee.

This, of course, is Scout, the cat to whose pee I'm referring.   Yes, she kind of resembles an alien, and true, she has ears big enough to replace wiretaps. 


She looks like she couldn't care less that, with the addition of a giant white smelly beast in her house, it's becoming Old MacDonald had a farm around here.  However....

This is the box where Scout should do her business.


This is the back-up box in case Scout gets picky and needs two separate boxes to do her business. (Note the unblemished litter.)

And this is Scout's new litter box, as evidenced by the giant pee stain taking up, oh, practically the whole rug.

Although Scout has been occasionally randomly picky about the where's and when's of going in her litter box, she has entered a new phase, going on six days in a row, of no-I-will-not-pee-in-my-box.  

On Thursday, I got so worried that I took her to the vet.  Two hours, $87, and a tested urine sample later, Scout was diagnosed as fine.  Fine, with a behavior problem.  The vet sent me home with a number for a pet therapist.  I wasn't sure if it was for Scout or me.

Since then, I have promised Scout a new car, a trip to the Caribbean -- anything, if she will only go pee, once again, in her litter box.  

And then I finally realized what was really going on.  As far as blogs, the score was Fonzie: 3, Scout: 0.

So I type.  And wait.  And pray for pee in a box.


5 comments:

evandebacle said...

"And then I finally realized what was really going on. As far as blogs, the score was Fonzie: 3, Scout: 0."

Tell Scout that I am very hurt. After all, thanks to me she had her very own blog! It's not nice of her to get greedy.

Naomi Jane said...

Scout is so embarrassed that she has gone pee....

Claire Just Claire Like Cher said...

Is she just reading too many of those corporate business books and thinking out of the box?! I KNOW, but I couldn't resist the most awful of puns. Give Scout big hugs and big ups from me. It's true, my focus has also veered in the Fonzie direction, so I'm putting part of my attention back on the original Scout Master! Big love...

Ashley said...

Okay, well, I have no idea what it's like to train an animal to do anything, but I still feel for you. However, I COMPLETELY relate to you about the bowl of cereal in the morning. Sometimes its the only thing that gets me out of bed. Ahh..so nice to know someone else feels the same thing. (p.s. wish I could see you and Willie over Christmas! Hope you have a wonderful time while you're here!!)

Claire Just Claire Like Cher said...

PS Ashley is right, I too only think it's worth getting out of bed if there's some good food on the other side of it. Or brunch. I like a little brunch buffet, that's worth it. ANYWAY, speaking of Scout's ears replacing wiretaps, this could fill the post-The-Wire void I have on HBO. (Well, I still need to watch the final season.) There's been plenty of crime-fighting dog stuff (maybe not plenty, but there's Turner and Hooch and a whole K-9 unit, etc.). Should Scout have her own crimefighting wiretapping show, THE SCOUT, where police get district attorneys to approve Probable Cause and then Scout moves next door to record their conversations and type it out in her smarty cat way? Maybe I'm too jet-lagged, but I like the idea. I'm just saying...